Doesn't feel right!

After my second dose of "inducement pill," my contractions really started to get going...and it was then that I realized something wasn't right.
I wasn't scared of having contractions, I was scared of the "coming out" part...but after talking to the nurse (awsome nurse Julie!), she explained to me that the epiderals in this hospital were specifically designed to take away only the pain of contractions and let you feel the pains of pushing and the coming out...go figure! So, I decided not to get one since it wouldn't help with what I wanted.
...but after the contractions actually got strong, I realized that something was wrong and they were different from what I felt with Aloria.
I wasn't progressing as fast it seemed I thought I should, and I was experiencing extreme pressure.
Aaron told me that if I wanted to change my mind about the epi that I would have to bring it up to him. By that time I was laboring in the shower, and said that I wanted to get it. I didn't want to get out until I had to, so I stuck my arm out so they stick me and hook me up to the saline solution while Aaron read me the consent form.
When I got out I signed it, and started getting the epi (guy on the right). Aaron supported me for a while, and then called for the nurse...seeing me get stuck in the back was a little much for him.
He did great though!

Unfortunatley, the epideral only took away the labor I felt in front and not the pressure I was feeling in back (the part actually really hurting me). It did make things a bit more tolerable though, so I just delt with it for a while...then at some point I lost it and started crying inbetween blowing. I think a lot of it was because things were so foreign from the first time. I don't know if it was the saline solution or a reaction from the epi, but I started shaking uncontrollably at every contraction (teeth chattering kind)...so Aaron or my mom, or both, would take turns holding me down by my shoulders to keep me from shaking so badly. It helped to calm me down.

Eventually, the Dr. came in when I was 9 1/2 cm and crying out to push...I told him that I thought Justus was backwards...he did a cervical check and said that he was OP...face up. I was already worried about him being so big, and then I started worrying about him coming out with a bruised face and it being harder to push, etc... It was already difficult for Aaron because he had to see me be put through all of the extra interventions we knew would happen if we got the epi, and he didn't like any of that. I was hooked up to an IV...saline, epi, catheder, patosin, arm cuff... Finally, it was time for me to push. I got his 14 1/4 inch head out in record time (for me), and then things went from 0-60 in record time. I pushed for 21 min. total, but it's difficult for me to say exactly what happened at what time, especially from my point of you...I heard a lot of it afterwards, so I will just relay the facts, as the actual emotion and intensity of the moment is really too difficult for me to properly convey.
After Justus' head came out, they realized that his shoulders were too big and he was stuck!
This is a big deal...for obvious reasons...once their head is out they are without oxygen until the rest of them gets out, so time is of the essence.
Marlene, who was holding one of my legs, said that the Dr. started pulling on his head with a good part of his strength and cork screwing him in a circle, trying to dislodge his shoulders...eventually, or during which time, he did several other things, like call in for the baby dr. to be ready and give his nurse a look (lady on the left). She responded to this look by climbing on the bed next to me, she had people shove my legs up to my head and started pushing down on my pubic bone...eventually she put her knee on my stomach for more leverage. I really wasn't sure what was happening at the time, other then that my nurse was on top of me and I was in excruciating pain yelling for them to stop. The only response I got was from my dr, who said, "Venessa, just do as you're told!" I realized then, that I had better push really really hard and help them, if only to get the nurse off of me. The baby's shoulders had been lodged behind my pubic bone, which is why the nurse was pushing there...to get them back underneath! It worked and Justus finally came out...very grey and purple. Marlene said that Dr. Robbins muttered something like..."oh good, his hands are moving." They took him over to the table to be examined. Dr. Robbins said later that there is a concern in those situations of him breaking his clavical bone on the way out, but had thought that his arm had broken. It hadn't. He had some bruising on his nose and chin, some scrapes on his bumpy squished head, and his left forarm and hand were grey from bruising, because his hand had come out up by his cheek. All of this was barely noticable by the next day, thank the Lord! His apgar score went from a 2 to an 8 in five minutes and he turned nice and pink. I was able to nurse him right away and sit in awe (most likely a state of trauma) in what had happened...especially since I didn't know most of what happened until after people told me.
Did I mention that I didn't tear AT ALL! Hallelluah!